Here at Little Otter, we teach our teachers and our parents to avoid asking “yes/no” questions to our little ones as a way to coax them into doing something we want. Why do we do this? Because, most of the time you’re hoping for a “yes” and you’ll get a “no”. So, how do we do to encourage cooperation from an independent toddler? We give them a sense of independence by offering them a choice.
Independent Swimming
“Do you want to swim to the island?” This question just begs a two year old to take control and assert their independence, even if he really wanted to swim to the island.
Try saying, “Do you want to swim to the island by yourself or do you want me to help you?” This still gives your child a choice, but also creates a setting for cooperation.
Instead of saying: “Pick the sinkies up from the bottom.” or “Do you want to pick up the sinkies?” Try this: Which color of sinkie would you like to get?”
When working on a skill that your child is especially uncomfortable with, distract them by taking the emphasis off of the skill and focus on the choice. “Which toy would you like to put on your tummy, the frog or the duck?” Don’t use the toy itself as the distraction, but use their ability to make a choice as the distraction.
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